With the help of these products, you can be photoshopped sex goddess!

How many men on their board of directors?

Several years ago, I used to read Cosmopolitan magazine. Every month, I'd buy it, read it on my lunchbreak, and inevitably end up purchasing more things I didn't need, and another magazine because a good portion of Cosmo is just advertising. I don't know why I did it. At the time I had unfortunately just tried dyeing my hair black, among other terrible beauty decisions (FYI Nair burns when left on too long. A lot.). I guess after that poor judgement call I felt I needed some guidance. Also, having been in a Christian school up til high school, my knowledge of sex was "don't do it." 

When you need to make a profit, just add self doubt!

         What better place to see what the rules are for a modern man and woman than Cosmo?

Eek! A period!

            “First Period HORROR Stories” was the first headline I caught. “We’re traumatized just reading them!” The pretty blond white woman stares nervously to the side. As was explained in The Codes of Gender, women are seldom portrayed as strong and confident in photography. Here she is accompanied by the expected masculine humor, which is funny because menstruation is a quality that is decidedly feminine and womanly, and should be accompanied by shame. Women are supposed to read these articles and be glad they were never so embarrassed by a bodily function. That intention, even without the photography, is embarrassing.

But if I don't read it, I'll never know!

            “Why He Wants to Tie You Up: And 6 More Male Fantasies Decoded” is another article being peddled this month as a young black and woman appear in a situation where she is posed in a submissive position beneath his advancing movements. Women are never to be placed in positions that are in power, and the article designed for a “women’s magazine” creates an insecurity that women need to purchase these magazines to get the information on men, because men are so different from women. The reality is that magazines like Cosmo and the advertisements they feature are not designed to cater to women, but to enforce the gender norm that women need to cater to men and male expectations of women. Cosmo emphasizes a divide in the sexes by advertising that women cannot please men without following their guides and advertisements, and assumes that women should be desiring to please a man at all!

Credits:

Overanalyzing

Someecards
Cosmo Screenshots of ads from their website

Books and Toys

            My mother was always one for reading when I was a child. I used to spend hours reading to myself or my youngest brother, who much to his dismay did not possess my unholy talent for reading The Very Hungry Caterpillar. I had a lot of favorites, but one that sticks out is the 1985 book Jillian Jiggs. I know my mother’s intentions in giving me that book were to trick me into cleaning my room. The story of this little girl is essentially that she constantly goes from activity to activity, without cleaning up after herself. As the oldest child, I think my mother thought that my brothers would follow my shining example (inspired by the book), if only I would opt to lead as a shining example instead of as a chameleon on crack. But I digress. Jillian Jiggs tells a story of a little girl who doesn’t seem to gender conform (she dresses up as a robot, a witch, a tree, a wild monster, etc) but her mother does fill the gender role of being the parent who stays home and disciplines/cleans up after the children.  Surrounded by my Star Wars action figures, I would read Jillian Jiggs, and concoct a new assortment of adventures and messes for my brothers and I to make. The power of the written word!

These may as well be in the photo album for my childhood. They only need more batman and glitter.

          My Star Wars toys were held in a far higher regard than my Barbies, but Barbie came with far more accessories that could be turned into the interior of the rebel base (complete with pink kitchen and hot tub), or stockpiled as supplies against the Empire, so I played with both. I know Star Wars wouldn’t pass the Bechdel test, but those action figures remain my favorite, even above my batman toys. It was cool, to my brothers, that a girl could play with “boy” toys… I don’t know what magic barrier there was, but I took pride in that sense of doing something that most girls wouldn’t do. As I looked for specifically gender non-conforming books, I remembered a year or two ago seeing one called My Princess Boy, a book a mother wrote for her son, who loves to wear dresses and princess style attire. Cheryl Kilodavis tells the story of her child differences in a society that puts a huge amount of pressure on gender conformity. The majority of the ratings on Amazon for the book are positive, with only 3 of 34 giving any negative feedback, two lamenting it wasn’t a good enough children’s storyline, and one complaining that the story is a gateway to complete delinquency.

"This book is [sic] a great reading material for parents with destructive and criminally-inclined children, because it teaches that no matter what a child grows into it is stil "OK""- Teapot Tales, Amazon.com

            The idea behind My Princess Boy is acceptance of other people as individuals, as unique, in their gender non-conformity or other differences. When I looked for a gender neutral or non-gender conforming toy, I was hard pressed to find anything. Every time I thought I found something, I would realize it was a “boy toy” covered in pink, because girls can only play on pink drum sets and pink guitars. I thought I’d finally found some in the lifestyle toys… then I looked at pictures.

You know it's a boy because he's got a blue shirt. Also, he's driving. 

First I spotted a “Mighty Wheelz” car, which was placed in the 3-7 age category. Then I remembered I was looking for a “girl” toy that was made “boy” friendly. I kept looking through cars. 

She's got her "Passenger's side pink!" shirt on. Ken's got super powers, so he can still drive the car even though it's pink. Must be in the blue shirt. Way to take one for the team, Ken!

I spotted the Barbie and Ken jeep, which depicted Ken driving Barbie’s jeep, just as the little boy is depicted driving the Mighty Wheelz jeep with a little girl riding in the passenger seat. Also, decidedly a girl's toy because of the Barbie/pink association. 

Teaching children of more than one gender to get back in the kitchen!

The next best thing I could find was a kitchen set, much more advanced looking that the one I played with as a child. Kitchen’s are stereotypically girls toys, though in the picture we see both a boy and girl playing with the toy. The little girl is talking on the phone, and the little boy is pretending to cook. While the toy might be showcasing it’s many activities in showing a little boy and little girl playing with different parts, I think it’s telling that the little boy is doing the “work” and the little girl is “socializing” on the phone. Even in gender neutral toys, gender roles are still alive and well. 

Credits:

Books- Amazon.com

Toy photos - ToysRUs.com

Jillian Jiggs